Thoughts of 21st Century Teen Girls on a Woman’s Role in Society Today

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Teen age. The intermediary stage between childhood and being an adult. The mid-ground between stories of a possible promising future and that of a unique past. It can be a very trying time – depending on how the person leaving the naivety of childhood comes to terms with the knowledge of what life really holds.

Today, we enter into a semi-public discussion of a group of teenage girls about what it is like to be a woman/lady/girl or as science may like to generally classify this part of society – female.

You know what my Mom told me today? She said I better ‘learn the ups and downs concerning housework – particularly being in the kitchen’. Basically, she said, “if you want to find and maintain a good, caring husband, you better learn how to cook and keep a house clean. And in my mind, I’m like hello? Did we travel back in time or what? This is the 21st Century for crying out loud – not some age where all we ladies care about is finding a good husband.

Well, you know what they say… a woman’s place is at home. It is generally believed that men are the breadwinners of the family and it is our duty as women to take care of the home. That’s the best we can do to contribute to building the family…

I see you’ve been brainwashed, huh. Look at all the nonsense you are spouting… talking about the place of a woman. Who gets the right to determine what we can or cannot do? Have you not heard of all the ladies out there who are making a difference in our world? Ladies with entrepreneurial minds who came up with amazing ideas that even some of the greatest men in our generation and past were not able to. Women like Anne Frank, Suu Kyi, Mother Teresa, Billy Jean King, Florence Nightingale, and Benazir Bhutto (among many others) dedicated their lives to support honorable causes. They are examples of how women can be much more in life.

But if they are proving that women are so much more than just housekeepers, why has society remained this way? In some parts of the world, teenage girls like ourselves are being groomed to be dependent on their spouses (in other words, men) and end up not being able to achieve anything meaningful in life. Then what’s the point of our ancestors fighting for the cause of girls receiving the equal education that guys do? I mean, since all we seem to be worth is being housewives, why bother?

You guys are probably right but have you considered the perspective of people such as myself? My dad’s job is very demanding and he often has to work late hours and Mom’s job requires her to travel a lot. So, right from 4 years old, the only time I can get us to eat together as a family is during the work holidays – that is if they don’t decide to work overtime. I mean, my Granny has been more of a parental figure to me that my biological ones. I believe that’s one reason the need came to choose at least one “parent” to stay behind and let the other do all earning work. In this case, it is generally understood that women are more capable of handling the stress that comes with this job description.

And again another unfortunate brainwashed teen. Why have you decided to come to terms with that? Who told you only women can handle it? Have you not of stay-at-home dads – some of whom are doing a much better job in that role than many women? How about the kids? Are you saying that they only need a mother’s love and attention? I totally respect women who sacrifice their career in order to properly raise their kids (i.e. housewives). They are doing a great job (it is a rewarding and important role). My issue is with the ideology that it is all we are worth. Listen.. both parties have a hand to play in the building up of the family. If only society can understand this and stop dumping all the load on us ladies.

I agree with you. Honestly, a majority of these things came to mind when my Mom made that statement. I actually took some time to craft my answer because I needed her to understand that although we are women/girls, and that cooking and good housekeeping are handy skills to have, we also have big dreams and should be allowed to do the great things that we are capable of.

In Conclusion

Alright, that’s all for today. Let’s leave our ladies to continue their discussion. Although, we were only able to hear from five out of over twenty girls partaking in the discussion; I believe we will have another opportunity to eavesdrop another time.

If you want to learn more about the impact the ladies mentioned in the discussion made in our world, be sure to view the picture below that I made.

7 Women who made a difference

Shout out to my fellow collaborators:

Collaboration Posts

NB: I’ll add to the list as they come.

Personal Additions

I’ll also like to include this article – 10 International Women’s Day Quotes by Candace N. Bisram.

Finally, closing remarks from my poetic role model – Robert Varga (he doesn’t even know I included him) –

Today, tomorrow and every day! Happy Women’s Day anyway!


    1. Haha. Happy Women’s Day to you too, Sensei.

      Those weren’t actually MY mom’s questions. I was basically voicing out the ideologies that seem to be reigning in many African countries and some parts of the world. These thoughts expressed here emerged from the discussion a group of teen girls had that I happened to overhear.

      I just want to bring more light to the fact that women are worth more than they are valued in parts of the world.
      Jane Love recently posted…Revelations of Jainey #5 – True FriendsMy Profile

  1. I love your insight! I have struggled between my goals and raising a family. I think I’ve done a good job on achieving success in both areas (the best I can). I have to pursue my goals, or it eats my alive. I think when you get married and have kids, it’s important to not lose yourself. Be a wife (if you choose to get married), mother (if you choose to have kids), and still pursue your passions.
    I love the conclusion you came to with your mother’s advice. “We also have big dreams and should be allowed to do the great things that we are capable of.” Yay! I agree.
    Ipuna Black recently posted…Collaboration with a Purpose: Dedicated to Women WorldwideMy Profile

  2. Gender roles have definitely shifted and it is a much different place then 20 and even 10 years ago. My husband is a very good example of someone who helps with house chores. But, I’ve also heard that even in this 21st century, not all men pick up the slack.

  3. I’m with you about what women can do and should do, Jane. I just think it’s time we all realized that women, like men, wear many “hats” and need to give themselves credit for all they do, and not get pigeonholed into cleaning, cooking, and child-rearing — unless that is what they want to do, or part of what they want to do.

    And yes, these questions are age-old, in some ways, and it is hard to believe we’re in the 21st Century now sometimes when we hear the same questions in the same ways being debated yet again. But maybe some truths need to be experienced, and if you don’t experience them, you don’t realize what that truth actually is?

    Great, thoughtful post.

  4. “if you want to find and maintain a good, caring husband, you better learn how to cook and keep a house clean. And in my mind, I’m like hello? Did we travel back in time or what? This is the 21st Century for crying out loud – not some age where all we ladies care about is finding a good husband.” I laughed hard after reading this, ‘coz someone also told me this. Back then, I didn’t know how to make my own coffee. I don’t drink coffee that much so I thought there was no need to learn. Anyways, she told me, how can you find a husband if you don’t know how to make coffee? I’m like, WTF! I’m not there to marry some guy whose criteria of marrying me is because I make great coffee. But I make great coffee now, so I think that should be bonus. Haha. Great post you have here and I echo your sentiments!
    Mylene Orillo recently posted…To All Women Who Made a Difference in My LifeMy Profile

  5. Great post, Jainey! I get what you feel; I grew up hearing that too (on top of other stereotypical stuff) and was like, “Bleh.” And it doesn’t help that my dad is a Very Traditional Asian™️ when it comes to gender roles. 😅

    Luckily my husband isn’t as traditionally set; he actually helps with house chores! I still end up with the bulk of house chores like laundry and cooking, but that’s because I chose to do them (not because I want to or think that’s what a wife does, but because I get off work hours before he does so it works better this way). 🙂

    Women can achieve more than just getting a husband, and they can achieve even if they remain single! Just because society expects women to be married and become a housewife, it doesn’t mean they should! 💪🏻

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